Self-respect or Happiness

Respect seems to be all anyone wants anymore, after all it is all I ever hear about. I have also heard people talk about how they want happiness but depend on that happiness through other things then the internal happiness, like money and love. Now to have to pick and choose between self-respect and happiness and which one is most important in my life, I would have to go with happiness. For some this may be mind boggling but let me explain. I have seen people and I personally know someone who is so self-respected it damages everything else around him, I refer to it as his pride. Self-respect is a wonderful quality to have and I suggest we all have it, but in a day and age like today, were depression is sky rocketing, happiness is my preference. I used to be prideful just like the gentlemen I mentioned above but I realized it did not make me feel as good as being happy does. When we expect everyone to respect us, there are too many chances of someone crossing the line and we end up losing someone who once made us happy because we are so concerned with this respect issue. I have watched and been a victim of receiving happiness from love and money. I always found away around the quote “money can’t buy you happiness” because for me it did, when I bought new cloths I was happy, for an hour, and then I was not anymore. Do not get me wrong because money can buy you happiness while it is there, but when it is gone I guarantee you wont be happy anymore. Now I have learned to find my happiness in my blessings. I am happy that I was blessed with the talent to play basketball, I am happy that I live to see another day and the beautiful people that surround me, the less materialistic things. Now if I had self-respect and no happiness and I would fall straight into depression, because it would be as if I was pushing people away who want to be near as soon as they offend me.
Choosing between the two is like being stuck between a rock and a hard place, but the two different sides help to make a precise decision. Thankfully this is not a life or death choice and we can still go on with both. I still carry my self-respect but I never let it get in the way of something or someone that makes me happy. I allow myself to look past the less important things that may alter my emotions and I am fine with that, I wish others would too because some peoples pride (self-respect) is way to much for just them to carry, it can be split between a couple of people. At the end of the day I am proud to be happy and I believe that is most important.

Body Language

Looking away and scratching somewhere when it does not even itch, we all have done these nonverbal gestures that clearly show one is uncomfortable. I have many body and facial gestures that I make when I am upset, sad, happy, irritated and uncomfortable and even ones I do not realize I am making. They range to so many different things that I do. When I am mad I walk away from situations and people heavily, meaning I stomp hard and walk fast and when I am sad I feel as if I glide through the pathways in which I walk but no matter what mood I am in I always have my head held high. While I walk with my head high I know that it says I am full of pride and this is correct, this particular body language sometimes makes people think many other things rather than having pride. I have heard it all through middle and high school that I was conceited and I thought I was too good because the way I walked on a normal day. What I failed to realize when I was younger was the other things I did like my facial gestures that made people think this. I hear that I always looked mad and never smiled, but I never knew that and I was not doing it purposely because I am a very happy person. All together those gestures made me out to be a “conceited B****” to those who did not know me.
Now that I am older I realize other people’s body language and how I pick up on them myself. I catch myself doing little gestures my friends or family do like lifting my nostrils and forehead when I do not like something, it sounds funny but the look really does portray what I now call “the ugh face”. It is so unbelievable how much can be said by a facial gesture, I have got myself into a coupled situations because of the faces I made. One time my college coach was yelling at me and I gave him the ugh face and he made me go sit down. The facial and body gestures are a bit uncontrollable they just come like a natural reaction. I try my best when dealing with body language to not come off uncomfortable because I do not want to make others uncomfortable, so I try and use my confidence and pride to pull things together when I can tell from someone else’s body language. Being able to read body language also helps to be able to control your own. I used to see a girl slouch in her chair and it always bugged me, I noticed that it showed little interest towards what was going on and I always made sure I never slouched in my seat weather I was in class or a meeting, because it gives off negativity.
Although eye contact is still a bit difficult for me to make with people I try my best do to it despite being uncomfortable. It is even more uncomfortable when people know you are uncomfortable and I do not want this to happen to me. I still walk with my head up because that is who I am, I smile to random people now and occasionally make my ugh face. My confidence and strong mind still get confused for being conceited but I am able to look past it. I try harder now to control my body language and always hope it comes off positive and not intimidating.

Conversation Obstacles

I have noticed while growing up I have always bonded easier with girls. I have had 5 best friends in my life time and all have been the same sex as me. Now do not get me wrong, I have had boy friends that I say hi and bye to but have never told a boy my secrets or been close enough or comfortable to have a deep conversation with. Even today it is much easier for me to approach a girl and start a conversation. A woman to women talk has much more things to discuss because women have a lot of things in common. Now if a women and a man held a conversation the topics are limited because the man may not know what topic will offend the women and quite frankly not all women are into cars and sports so how much they talk about and how easily it is communicated is limited. I tend to feel uncomfortable while talking to men, in no way do I mean insecure. When I try to strike up a conversation with a male I always feel like they are trying to hit on me or they think I am trying to hit on them. The feeling really is unfortunate because it has cost me a lot of friendships and opportunities because I shut a lot of people out of my life due to this issue. On another note females are not approachable but are very conversational and understand things. The majority of women talk about their issues and care to comfort those who are having issues too, thus Is why mothers and daughters are able to hold conversation easier than a father might to his son. Men are also known to be egotistic and full of pride, a father expects more from his son than anyone else and in many situations a son may not feel up to his father’s expectations. It is also harder for a son and father to hold a conversation due to the fact that men do not like to express emotion in most cases, so a man’s son may not feel like his father would be interested in his feelings and this causes barrier. Men like to talk about the more materialistic things rather than emotion and issues. I am a daughter of one man and a step-daughter of another; I have never gone to either one of my father’s with a problem I was having and I have never heard them speak of a problem themselves, it has always been my mom. I have even tried to whisper things to my mom just because I feel like my dad just does not understand the things and feelings we girls feel. I know a man’s relationship with his daughter is different than a relationship with his son but in my opinion men are just overall hard to communicate to and in my situation is even harder because I have this wall up anyway that makes conversation with the opposite sex awkward.

Foreign Language is a choice

In high school we are required to take two years of a foreign language and in high school we were limited to one choice and that was espanol (Spanish). I have yet to hear of any schools that offer any other form of foreign language besides the Spanish classes. I had to take two years of Spanish to graduate and quit honestly I still have not mastered the language. It was a pain in the butt as well because I rather of taken a different elective that I was interested in rather then forced to take the course. I believe that colleges and universities should not make it mandatory to have foreign language experience to get in or to graduate because the classes would not do much if the student is not interested in the subject to begin with. There are many individuals that roam our world that are bilingual or can even speak three languages, why must we need anymore? The foreign language classes should be exactly what they are labeled as and that is electives. According to my counselors electives were a group of classes you got to choose from as a kind of a leisure activity, and studying Spanish was not fun to any of my classmates or me. Students should be able to choose extra classes that they are interested in. Spanish is not a core class and most people who take it forget it in a year. if they are interested in it then let them take the class voluntarily! In another aspect foreign language is not something as individuals we need to survive in the world. Of course it is very nice when we receive incentives for being bilingual at jobs and such but there is no real need to be fluent in more than one language. Learning a foreign language is beneficial but it is not so crucial that the state must demand it be taught to students who would like to attend college. I know there have been discussions about adopting English as our language here in The United States of America, and if this is as serious as they make it out to be then there really is no need to learn or have background familiarities with another language because it would not do a single thing. They are discouraging any other form of language to be successful but yet demand and require we learn more about it. The poor children in schools have enough on their plate since English is required. How can we learn two different languages at one time, this even gets interesting because the two languages can get mixed up and make things harder than they should. Despite that there are plenty of youth who are already struggling with our language, the language they are familiar with and then the high schools throw another difficult course at them, it is no wonder the dropout rate is so ridiculous; we are overwhelmed sometimes. These foreign language courses should just be available and let the students pick and chose them as they please, after all if English is going to be our dominate language we should not be required to know about another

Favorable judgment Vs. Unfavorable

My Favorable Judgement: I remember back when I begged for my Ugg boots. It took me a year to realize that Ugg boots were not just an ordinary pair of fluffy boots and another year to actually get my boyfriend to buy them for me. The original Ugg boot was made of Australian sheepskin and they are incredibly warm, and soft. They fit a little larger so you feet have room to move around in. Ugg boots are very sturdy; they are heavy and stand out in a stylish way. These boots have become a major hit with celebrities and trendsetters alike over the past couple of years. These boots can be worn with anything; amazingly they even look great with my basketball uniform. The come in four prominent colors which are black, chocolate brown, tan and chestnut. They sell for a very nice price of 164 dollars after taxes and all. The price is nothing to complain about once you see the quality of the boot. You almost feel left out if you do not own a pair of Ugg boots because so many people have them; be careful though you do not get bamboozled by the fake Ugg boots, you know the ones that look pretty much the same but do not say Ugg on the back of the boot and are made of anything but Australian sheep skin. The” want to be” Uggs are sold almost anywhere but the true Uggs are only sold in certain shoe stores that reside in major malls. I feel in love with these boots when I saw them and fall in love every time I put them on my feet.


My Unfavorable Judgement:I had to beg for a pair of Ugg boots before I got them, I suppose it was because they cost so much; 164 dollars and some change was the price on those things. I could buy sixteen pairs of the lookalike ones that sell at the Los Angeles fashion district for ten dollars a pop. They look exactly the same, not to mention some even look better and come in a variety of colors; I am not just limited to four. Also I can travel to a local store to purchase the non-name brand boot rather than driving across the city to get to a store that sells them. The original Ugg boots have so much fur inside that it expands the boot and makes your foot look larger than it should, not to mention although it is made of Australian sheep skin the boot cannot withstand rain and liquid without a noticeable change to the texture of the boot. The boot is so heavy and because they fit a bit big it is hard for them to stay on your feet and it feels like you are walking with weights. These boots Ugg or not are so popular, everyone has them, in a world where everyone claims to be different why are we spending 164 dollars to all be the same. People think the boot looks good with anything, it is pathetic you see girls wondering around with dresses and Ugg boots on at the same time. It is either winter or summer not both at once.